Vulnerability Post: Living With Rosacea + An Autoimmune Disease
I don’t usually talk about this part of my life. It’s easier to focus on the garden, the jars of golden oils, the petals on my counter. But Zen Reset was born out of one of the hardest chapters of my life, and it doesn’t make sense to share it without telling you why.
For years, my skin was in crisis. Rosacea, hives, welts, constant inflammation — all layered on top of the damage done by years of high-dose medications for my autoimmune disease. My skin had become so thin, so fragile, that even laying my head on a pillow sometimes hurt. I spent a year trying treatment after treatment. Every appointment ended the same way: “Be patient, Dena. These things take time.”
So I kept going, kept trying, kept hoping. And then one day, my doctor sat me down. She looked me straight in the eye and said, “Dena, we’ve reached the end of the road.”
She explained that the length and dosage of my past medications had thinned my skin severely — and with the added damage from severe rosacea, there wasn’t much left to do. Her only answer? Laser treatments. I thought, okay, let’s do that. Then she told me: $500 a session. A minimum of five sessions. And probably more over time, because I’d likely have to go back on Prednisone again during future flare-ups, just like I had for the last 10 years.
I sat there in shock, silent, until she asked gently,
“Dena… did you hear what I said?” And then I cried. And the tears burned my tender skin.
I left the office feeling hollow. It wasn’t just about the treatments or the cost — it was the reality setting in. Gone were the hopes of waking up with calm, even skin. Gone were the dreams of going out in public without stares, without explaining, without hiding behind layers of makeup. After that, things felt heavier. I avoided mirrors. I cancelled plans. I dodged cameras. I pulled my hair forward to hide my cheeks. When I did go out, I caught myself scanning the faces around me, wondering if people noticed, if they were staring. I thought…“I wish I would have been more grateful back when I was pretty”.
I was angry. Embarrassed. Defeated. And yet… somewhere in all that frustration, a quiet voice inside me said, “Go back to what you know.” So I did. I went back to my garden. Back to the plants.
I started experimenting — lining up jars on my counter, filling them with chamomile, calendula, and lavender, letting them slowly infuse in golden oil that would soothe my skin without clogging my pores for weeks. Making the rosacea worse. I didn’t have a plan. I wasn’t thinking about starting a business or creating a product. I just wanted something gentle. Something my skin wouldn’t fight against.
That’s where Zen Reset began. It came from desperation, but also from hope — hope that maybe, finally, my skin could feel calm again. Zen Reset is made with the same plants I trusted on my own skin when nothing else worked: chamomile to soothe, calendula to repair, lavender to quiet the fire beneath the surface, rosemary to fight bacteria. Slowly they were infused into light weight oils that carry those compounds deep where healing begins without feeling greasy.
It’s not magic. It doesn’t erase everything. But it’s the first thing that ever made me feel like my skin could breathe again. At the very least it stopped the burning. And that’s why I make it the way I do — slow, intentional, hands-on. Because I remember what it felt like to sit in that dermatologist’s office, unsuccessfully trying to hold back tears that felt like acid on my cheeks. I remember the shame, the frustration, the helplessness.
If you’ve ever felt trapped in your own skin, I want you to know this: you’re not alone. There are gentler ways forward. Zen Reset was mine — and if your skin feels reactive, inflamed, or like nothing’s working, maybe it can be yours too. I hope it can be.
Rest Well,
Dena
